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Thread: How about a HUMOR/LAUGHTER/JOKE gallery?? Post 'em here

  1. #286
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Merritt Island, FL
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    The Top Ten Reasons Men Prefer Guns Over Women

    #10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

    #9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for
    when you're on the road.

    #8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he
    will probably let you try it out a few times.

    #7. Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another
    gun for a backup.

    #6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of

    #5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

    #4. Guns function normally every day of the month.

    #3. A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me
    look fat?"

    #2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you
    use it.

    And the number one reason a gun is favored over a


  2. #287
    Just keepin updated!!

    Raven's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Mesquite, TX
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    Dear Husband:

    I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
    I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to
    show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
    tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
    Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair
    and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new
    negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to
    sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore,
    you don't touch me or anything. Either you're cheating or you don't
    love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

    P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
    away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

    Signed: Your EX-Wife


    Dear Ex-Wife:

    Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true
    that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good
    woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to
    try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I
    did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first
    thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother
    raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you
    cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY
    BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to
    sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag
    was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother
    had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee
    was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
    out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million
    dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I
    got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I
    hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with
    your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

    P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was
    born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

    Signed: Rich As Hell and Free!

  3. #288

    joeb's harley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    kirkland lake ontario canada
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    Cardiologist's Funeral
    > A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge heart
    > covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.
    > Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside.
    > The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart
    > forever.
    > At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes
    > stared at him, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own
    > funeral.........I'm a gynecologist."
    > The proctologist fainted.

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