One evening last week, a husband and wife were getting into bed. Well, the passion started to heat up, but she suddenly said, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

He said "What???!!! Why?"

So she said the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear, "You are just not in touch with my emotional needs, as a man, for me to let you satisfy my physical needs, as a woman."

And to that, he gave a puzzled look back. She responded to his puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, he went to sleep.

The very next day he opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. They went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at Saks. He walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so he told her that he would just buy all of them for her. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so he said, "How about you get a pair for each outfit."

Then she went on to the jewelry department, where he followed, and told her to pick out anything she wanted. She picked out a pair of diamond earrings with pure excitment. She must have thought he was a few beers short of being a twelve pack, because of him telling her to pick out anything in the jewerly department. He then started to think she was testing him because she asked for a tennis bracelet, when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. He threw her for a loop when he said, "That's fine, honey, whatever you want."

She was almost nearing satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally stated, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

He could hardly contain himself when he blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled cry of, "WHAT???!!!"

He then said, "Really honey! I just want you to hold this stuff for awhile. You're just not enough in touch with my financial needs, as a woman, for me to satisfy your shopping needs, as a man."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, he added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently he did not get any that night either.